Bonus: Family Pictures

Here is a link for our family pictures we recently had taken. Hope you enjoy. There are a lot of them.

http://www.gogetphotos.com/Client-Galleries/Family-Portraits/McLain-Family-2011/19806355_SSbGfd#1556718460_QTLDcK6

Days 7 & 8 Laughter

I am grateful for laughter. Especially laughter from or caused by my children. They say the most silliest things, and sometime I have to hold in the laughter so as not to embarrass them. This morning Emily informed me that she no longer wanted to be a girl, and that it isn't fair that Thomas gets to be the only boy. I chuckled because it was so random.

Abby has been very frustrated about the weather lately. She wants Christmas to come next and not Thanksgiving. After trying to explain it to her, and getting nowhere, I told her to take it up with Heavenly Father about her feelings. She left the room, and came back a few minutes later to tell me that she did. We'll see if it changes on upcoming calendars:)

Thomas this morning was telling knock knock jokes, and just making them up and laughing hard, so of course Nathan jumped in with sharing them too. It was a happy morning.

And then there is Sarah. When I look at her she starts to smile and it just melts me. She is starting to laugh, and it makes me smile.

Laughter. It is a wonderful thing.

Day 6: Contentment

Today in church we were talking about the teachings of Paul, and I read this scripture:

"Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content." Philippians 4:11.

Being content in the state that I am in. This is hard. I seem to always want things to speed up just to get through a difficult time in my life, that I miss the lessons that Heavenly Father wants me to learn along the way. I find myself hoping that my kids will grow up faster so maybe then they will listen better and be more reasonable, (ha, ha) and yet I will never get this time back.

Our Sunday school teacher gave us the challenge to pick something and to work on this week. I am going to focus on being content. I want to enjoy the journey. All of the challenges that I will face this week as well as all the happy things. I want to be content with what I have. I am truly blessed.

Here We Go Again?

Ok, so I admit I have never gotten into this blogging thing. I enjoy reading other peoples posts, but I'm not very good at writing them myself. We'll try this again, even though I don't think anyone reads this. Maybe it will be good, cheap therapy for me. :)

Since it is the month of November, I'm going to join the bandwagon and say what I am thankful for. Abby is already starting her Christmas list, and she doesn't understand why Christmas can't come before Thanksgiving. I told her it is because we have to express our thanks first, before we go asking for everything under the sun.

So to catch up with the date of November 5, here are the 5 things I am currently thankful for:
1. My husband. Nathan is a wonderful provider for our family. His love and sacrifice for me allows, no gives me the blessing of staying home with my children. He works very hard for us, and I don't thank him enough.

2. My children. If I step back and allow myself to see them as Heavenly Father sees them, then I am truly blessed to have them. Yes, they are loud at times, and demanding with their requests, but I love them, and I'm grateful to each of them for making me a mother.

3. My parents. I am thankful for the lessons my parents taught me. They loved each other and loved us. They spent time with me and listened to my feelings and disappointments in my life. They never judged me. I know I could always come to them, and they would love me unconditionally.

4. The Gospel. I am thankful for a loving Heavenly Father and the atonement of Jesus Christ. It has blessed me throughout my life as I fall down and pick myself back up and to keep trying even when it seems impossible. I'm grateful that I have a simple faith that makes sense to me and that I don't question. It keeps me going.

5. Heat. Today is our first official snow of the season. Even though there isn't a lot of snow, it is cold outside. I am grateful for my heater that keeps me and my children warm. Sometimes it truly is the little things that make all the difference.

Purging

Last night I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep, so I started reflecting on my life. Sadly, I didn't like what I saw. I have not been a nice person lately to my family. I have been mean, unkind, selfish, and all out nasty. Have you ever gotten to that point, where you just feel dark inside? All you can see is negativity, anger, disappointment, regrets, hate and all around bleakness? That is where I have been.
I think subconsciously I like carrying around this gloominess because it is comforting. It is what I know, and has been there. It is easier in a way than making an effort to change. I hate change. :) It is very hard for me. Sometimes I see a glimmer of light, but then something happens that causes the darkness to come back.
Ironically I have started reading my scriptures again and little by little, messages are touching my heart. I was reading about Ammon and his experience with King Lamoni. The gospel touched his heart and caused all the hatered he had for the Nephites to disappear. It touched him so much, that he and his people had no more desire to use their weapons of war. They would rather die, than hurt their brethern. This got me to thinking, Why is it easier for me to be a Gadianton Robber than an Anti Nephi Lehi? Why can't I keep my weapons of war buried? And what are my weapons of war? They are the hurtful words I use with my children, grabbing them in anger, feelings of indifferent with them, and I think even not caring about myself, my home, or my life. These are the weapons that I need to bury. The Gadianton robbers kept uncovering their weapons, because Satan kept reminding them of where they were hidden. He wanted them to be stirred up in anger, vengence and downright nastiness. When I am acting like this, the Gadianton Robbers are winning.

I don't want them to win anymore. I don't want to feel like this anymore. I want the peace that the gospel brings. I want to turn it all over to the One who can heal my broken heart and make me whole again. Why is that so hard? Why is my heart willing, but my flesh is weak?

Why can't I have the perfect faith of my little Emily who just brought me a picture and pointed to it with a big smile on her face, and said "Jesus". She knows, and deep down I know too.
That is what keeps me trying. Maybe this time will be different.

Gratitude

Today I am grateful. Grateful for my 3 beautiful, healthy children. Why am I so blessed to have healthy children, while so many others are not. We had a family in our ward who had a daughter with heart problems from birth. I started following her blog and came across the following family. I have started reading their blog and it has touched me so much. There are really no words to describe it.
Read it. You won't be the same after. It will touch you.

http://thisandthataboutthebowmans.blogspot.com/

Being Happy

After church today I asked Thomas if he was happy. This was our conversation.

M: Thomas, are you happy?
T: Yes.
M: Why are you happy?
T: Because Jesus is real.
M: How do you know Jesus is real.
T: Because I feel it in my heart.

I feel it too.
Happy Sunday.